On Singing at the Crack of Dawn (Pre-Noon)
So I’m a singer. Kinda. It’s one of those things that I like to do so I simply decide that I’ll be one. Just like being a writer, editor, publisher, webmaster, entrepreneur, music critic, lecturer, poet, artist, master electrician, CSS guru, track star, baseball star (I played in college), basketball star, golf pro, recording engineer, producer, arranger, composer, lyricist, tunesmith, network systems administrator, marketer, cook, inventor, graphic designer, innovator, RC pilot, and future official endorser of Campbell’s Chunky Soup. That’s just a very brief short list of all the things I consider myself to be.
Anyway, I like to sing, but not in the morning. My voice just does not work in the morning. In fact my whole body doesn’t work in the morning!
Sometimes it’s worse than others of course, but often there’s massive congestion and a great lowering of complete and entire vocal registers. Which is kinda cool, actually, unless you have to sing something besides bass.
So Sunday morning a few weeks ago was one of those mornings. And I had to lead singing in church. I suppose I sounded like somebody had slowed down the playback speed, and it felt like my voice weighed a ton. Those high notes seemed like lifting a 100 pound bag up over your head, higher, higher, forget it, there’s no way! Give up before you die!! And next time don’t even try to sing in the morning!!!
I managed to get through it somehow. I’ll tell you what I do, though, to try to get some good out of the situation. Since my voice is in the cellar anyway, when I announce the song number and whatnot I growl as low as I can (albeit pleasantly).
“Turn to song number 315,” I rumble with satisfaction.
And during Sunday school when it’s my turn to read a verse! I start low and use nice inflection but try to end each line scraping the bottom with a growly rasp.
It’s my method of extracting some small measure of pleasure out of an unfortunate circumstance.
And guess who’s leading singing this Sunday?! Hopefully it’s not another one of those mornings.
5 Responses
October 7th, 2005 at 7:54 am
I, of course, can attest to this fact. Great post.
October 7th, 2005 at 10:18 am
C’mon, when you lead singing, it’s like the rest of the congregation decides they’ll sing too. And if the rest of the congregation sings loudly enough, you don’t have to feel like you’re singing poorly. Comprende vous?
And Ag: I’m terribly sorry I offended you. But I grew up in Canada where we breathe hockey and where my 7 year old female cousin would skate circles around them. I guess in my Canadianism I was disgusted over the lack of reality…they played Jamaica. And Iceland? Being a contender? Where was Team Canada and Team Russia? As you can tell I’m just another brain-washed Canadian!
-Kaitlyn
October 7th, 2005 at 5:23 pm
Kaitlyn, do not worry too much about offending Ag, she will get over it ok. Won’t you Ag. {:^)
And Ag, what is this about “hunks”; I thought menno girls didn’t talk of such worldly things, at least in such a public forum as this blog. {;^)
October 8th, 2005 at 1:13 pm
Kaitlyn, that was probably the only period of my life where I was even vaguely interested in sports. Hey, we’re talking movies here. Reality does not need to exist.
TS, oh you crack me up. Hunks are not wordly, they are just……well……..existent. You know, like the air we breathe, the ground we walk on, the……you get the picture?
Considering the fact that I never want to fit the mold of “traditional mennonite girl”, I will take your words and hold them as precious treasures. The “traditional mennonite girl” has a very small world. Traggic!
Ag
October 8th, 2005 at 9:54 pm
Hey, Tom, I finally followed through with my promise to show you some REALLY “cool” cars. Needless to say, I think they need a little more work! :)